A bad day for the crow
by Chocolatepants
Summary: My back was turned to them, and I was more than willing to sprint a thousand miles away from them if I had to. "Ah, Awashima-kun, Fushimi-kun, please have a seat." I could feel his gaze turn to me, "Waiter!"
1. Very absolutely broke

This is the worst day of my life. I'll call it even with the day I broke Totsuka-san's car.

No, breaking Totsuka-san's car was I little worse I guess… I mean Mikoto-san…and then Kusanagi-san…..and… okay, I think I'll stop my ramblings here.

So no, I will not tell you what happened today, nor will the stupid meddling ugly big fat author.

No, she/he/it will never tell you.

So you can go to the corner of the room and sulk in your self-pity while I and the author shall happily keep our mouths shut and-

**~CHOCOLATEPANTS HAS BETRAYED YATA MISAKI~**

~~~FLASHY BACK! ~~~

It was 9.00 AM at Saturday, my favorite day, but not my favorite time.

You know well why. I was in the middle of my sleep dreaming of hitting furry man-gorillas, skateboards and that strange hair-colored girl when I heard knocks and bangs on my door.

And of course being the civilized person I am I had planned to go out topolitely greet the person and kindly tell them to get a life and then slam the door in their faces.

I repeat I had only _planned_ to do so.

Grumpily, I made my way out of my room and to the front door, I turned the knob and without further hesitation-

"WHAT THE % #$ IS IT? DO YOU KNOW WHAT $%^#$# ' TIME IT IS?!"

The little boy who was holding a letter A.K.A the unwanted visitor jolted backwards, almost tripping over the stairs.

Heh, you got 'em good yatagarasu.

The boy started shivering, his face lowered hiding his eyes, "E-excuse m-me…" He stammered, I groaned. A scaredy cat, he was going to slow things down.

"Thi-this is f-from the video re-rental-"

_Video rental? Did I rent a video? Oh, yeah, now I remember. Anna and the rest once came here to watch that zombie movie sometime ago… I don't really remember giving it back._

_OH NO!_

"Hold up kid," I cut, holding my hand up, "When was this due?"

The little boy held up the letter and scanned its contents, "Th-three months a-ago…" He stated and looked up to me. I didn't fail to see his glass-like eyes.

Wait, three MONTHS ago?

"Uh, how much is the-?" I didn't dare say it, the word was like a curse. An ancient curse that could make my pocket flat in less than a day.

The boy read the letter again, "5500 yens."

My eyes bulged, I felt like they would fall out any seconds, "WHAT?"

The boy jumped, "U-uh, 5500….ye-yens…."

"WHAT THE !(!# !& %#%%#^! ^# ^!%# # THREE MONTHS! IT WAS DUE THREE MONTHS AGO AND I OWE YOU 5500 YENS?!"

Tears streaked on the boy's face, his face was red hot and he had probably wet his pants.

"U-uh…"

I huffed angrily. "Okay kid, leave."

The boy looked up at me one last time before running away, tear stained, wet panted and arms flailing in the air as he shrieked all the way home.

And I just stood there.

Wanting to call my mom and borrow some money. But I know she wouldn't, she stopped doing that two years ago. She replaced money with a fifteen minute lecture followed by the stupid promises that I have to make… which is very bad for my phone bill. Considering that I am very broke.

There. I said it. And I DO NOT want to say it again.

I was in the midst of thinking that I didn't realize that someone was standing right in front of me.

But I knew it, I mean it's complicated, when I realized that he was there I was motionless and just coolly looked at him.

It's not like I jumped and screeched like a little girl and almost slammed the door in his face. Heck no, it didn't happen. IT DIDN'T.

"MI~SA~KI~~"

You know who this is.

%!#$ SLAP!

"WHAT THE #$% DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

Saruhiko Fushimi rubbed his sore cheek. "Uh, visiting?"

Another vein popped, "WHAT THE #$&^$ YOU DON'T VISIT!"

The monkey grinned, "You're right, I don't, " He chuckled. The glint in his eyes something that I learned not to trust, "But I did overhear about you being broke…"

_HE HEARD THAT? SO I WAS TALKING ALOUD?_

"Uh, yes, yes you were…"

_HE HEARD THAT TOO?_

"Yes. Now shut up the neighborhood is gonna blame me."

"YOU-!"

Saru held up his hand, "Look, I just wanted to say that there is a place that might offer you a job." He pointed out.

"There is?" I asked, amused. I think my eyes would have been twinkling stars.

"Yes, " I failed to catch the grin on his face as he turned round. "Luckily it's right next to the Homra bar."

My eyes twinkled even more.

"Well, if you would excuse me. I will be off to work." He didn't turn back after saying that, and I was too preoccupied with guessing what it might be to hear his maniac-like laugh.

I hope it would be something that requires strength. I'm the MAN for that.

* * *

**CHOCOLATEPANTS actually ran out of ideas... and this is lame. But anyhoo.**

**Please review and give CHOCOLATEPANTS a few advices!**

**CHOCOLATEPANTS...AWAAAAAAAAAAY! :)**


	2. Dear god

"His reign of terror must stop!

His game of darkness shall not continue!

For the sake of the land of Hikari, we must defeat Yata the evil overlord!"

I scoffed. _So, he thought this was going to be funny, eh? WELL NO_

I glared at the customers as the 'hero' recited his famous line. Working at a cosplay café was a drag. Oh, and did you know that it was** RIGHT ACROSS THE EFFIN' HOMRA BAR?!**

So anyway, the customers (Ogling fan girls) giggled and blushed as the 'hero' handed out the menu and asked for their orders. And of course, they just ordered coffee. Although their eyes were clearly shouting _'YOU!'_

I felt a hand pat my shoulder, and I looked to see that the 'hero' was standing right before me.

"Misaki?" He said with his oh so light and sweet voice. No wonder the girls fancied him.

I narrowed my eyes, "Yeah?"

"Quit zoning out, you know a customer just came in and the rest is kind of full."

I bobbed my head, "Okay sure…" I strode away, taking the menu and the notepad.

"Oh, hey!" He called back, I turned my head around, "Remember our rehearsal, and don't freak out when he or she tries to tease you. Just flirt back." He smiled his signature smile and I could feel a few laser-eyes behind me direct at him.

With that, he walked back into the kitchen. And I had to agree with the fan girls though, he is…kinda cute.

Just for the record.

**I AM EFFIN' STRAIGHT.**

So, I made my way to the table which was a struggle because I happen to be wearing a kimono with a katana strapped to my side, and chest bindings within the kimono with an addition of makeup. You know mustache, angry eyebrows and such.

And if I was allowed to say it, this is truly embarrassing.

When I reached there I coughed and mustered all the strength I could.

_Remember our rehearsal, don't freak out…_

"Welcome, to our cosplay café. I am Yata Misaki, or you may call 'Lord Yata'.

Fear my wrath! My fury! And my hatred as I burn you to black ashes!"

I could feel that a few people were staring, most of them were girls. _No! Did I mess up? This is embarrassing!_

But I was sure I didn't mess up my lines like the last time. And to be honest I was kinda proud of this one.

Especially the 'Lord Yata' part. That is gold.

I stared at my customer; his face was hidden by a newspaper he was reading. Just as I was about to say something else I heard him snort.

"Well played…Misaki…"

He folded back the newspapers, and I got a heart attack.

The only person I wanted to turn into black ashes now. Is me.

* * *

"Kusanagi… Someone in the cosplay café looks exactly like Yata-san…"

I almost dropped the bottle of wine I was holding.

"Uh, excuse me Kamamoto-san?"

The round man stared at me and then pointed out the window, "That fellow out there, he looks like Yata-san…"

Anna shifted her gaze from her orange juice and looked out the window. I did the same.

**HOLY SHIZZELZZ**

* * *

"A cup of white coffee please."

I nervously scribbled down his order. _MUST IT REALLY BE HIM? GOD….WHY?!_

"You spelled it wrong."

I blushed, "Uh, e-excuse me?" Cool Misaki. Very smooth.

"'Coffee' you forgot another 'f''

_I CAN SPELL WHAT I EFFIN' WANT TO_

"Ah, yes of course…" I sighed and scribbled it off. Re-writing it under the scribbles.

"Now, you have only one 'e'"

Twitch.

"Ah, yes, please forgive me…" This guy was really getting on my nerves…

The man fixed his glasses, pushing it further up his nose. "Oh, my other two comrades will be here in a little while. I'd like 'you' to take down their orders please." He smiled sweetly and took out his phone.

_Wait, two?_

I coughed, "Um, two people sir?"

"Yes."

_AND WHO MIGHT THESE TWO WONDERFUL PEOPLE BE?_

"Awashima Seri, Saruhiko Fushimi. Please."

**I WANT TO DIE SO BADLY!**

"People are looking you know…"

"I…said that aloud…didn't I?"

"Yes. Yes you did."

I groaned, "Please wait for about five minutes sir."

The man in blue nodded and proceeded to type things into his phone.

Of all the cosplay and maid café's in Japan why did he have to come here?

Oh, right. The monkey must have told him and wanted to make me into a laughing stock for his darn clan. Stupid monkey.

I came back to the king's table and handed out his white coffee. Luckily for me the two wonderful people weren't there yet. Thank my lucky stars!

"Captain!"

Do not thank my lucky stars!

My back was turned to them, and I was more than willing to sprint a thousand miles away from them if I had to.

"Ah, Awashima-kun, Fushimi-kun, please have a seat." I could feel his gaze turn to me, "Waiter!"

DEAR GOD.

* * *

**CHOCOLATEPANTS enjoyed making this chapter, thanks for all the views!**

**CHOCOLATEPANTS...AWAAAAAAAY!**


	3. They just get better and better

CHOCOLATEPANTS is very sorry, but CHOCOLATEPANTS was bullied by none other than that mean Chihuahua man (Gets shot on the leg).

CHOCOLATEPANTS meant, Lord Yata. (Insert cruel laughter in the background)

So CHOCOLATEPANTS is not allowed to tell you what happened. But CHOCOLATEPANTS never keeps CHOCOLATEPANTS' promises. So there.

~~~SLIGHTY CUT OUT FLASHY BACK! ~~~

What a day.

What a day indeed. So, I was serving the blue king and his pet dogs in a kimono, with makeup that resulted in them cracking-up before I could even say anything.

The lines that I had to say didn't make anything better. Because they are now using it against me.

"Lord Misaki~ where is my capuchino?"

"Evil overlord, please don't burn my muffin into black ashes."

"Misaki, you spelled it wrong again."

FOR GOD'S SAKE CAN ANYONE MAKE 'EM SHUT UP?!

"Misaki," I heard her call. Yes, the heartless woman. Awashima Seri, "I'd like black coffee please."

I nodded and wrote it in the notepad.

"You spelled 'coffee' wrong again you know…"

_CAN YOU PLEASE STOP REMINDING ME?!_

"Sorry, it must have bothered you."

"Yes, its fine." I grumbled.

I was right about one thing, this job requires SERIOUS amount of strength. And I have proven to be very weak, because I can feel wrinkles forming somewhere on my face.

Just before I walked away the blonde woman called back, "Oh, and put some seaweed in it please."

_What?_

"Seaweed." She repeated. Her two companions stared at me, their eyes saying:_ Just do it kid._

"Ah…Okay…" I slowly said.

"And put some vinegar in it too."

I don't think I would be able to eat in a few days.

To make a long story short. The café didn't have any seaweed. And they were a bit low on vinegar as well, besides this is an English kind of café. Yes, an English cosplay café.

So I had no other choice than to say that her choice of food cannot be served.

"Yata-san!" I jumped, the 'hero' had called me. Seriously, he was acting like the boss in here.

"What do you think you're doing? The minimarket isn't far away from here, buy some seaweed there!"

"Wh-what?" I stammered, was he siding with the blues or something?

He pinched the bridge of his nose, "If we don't have it then we have to try and have it. The customers are like our king. We must satisfy them at any cost!"

_THIS IS MADNESS!_

* * *

So, I am a villain in a kimono, wearing makeup and riding a skateboard.

I'm so bad-ass.

I was about to kick my feet off the ground when I felt two arms wrap around my waist.

"What the-?"

I turned around to see that there was _a girl_ hugging me from behind. I instantly blushed a million colors of red. I was about to push her off gently when I heard her hiccup.

"Mah, prinz charmin' take me awaaaay! –Hic-"

She was drunk. In the middle of effin' daylight! What kind of idiot does that?

Apparently she does.

"WHO **ARE** YOU?!" I shouted, I didn't care if she was a girl and that I was blushing. I don't want a drunkard hooked on my back for the rest of the day.

"I am teh prinzes of teh land of higari….." She slurred, "-hic- you muzz be mah prinz charmin…."

"WHA-WHAT? GET OFF ME!" I yelled at her ears, she jumped and I took this opportunity to push her off my skateboard and away from my territory.

"That wazn't nice!" She shouted, her eyes scanned me, from there I could tell that she was a mile away from being sober.

"OH!" she jumped in realization, like when you've finally found the answer to an algebra exercise.

"You're not a prinz!" Dang straight.

She beamed, not losing her drunken attitude, "You're William Shakesperzz!"

_What?!_

"Uh, okay, look lady I don't have time, so-" I was about to turn around and ride away as fast as I could when she hugged me.

"Oh mah god! Willie, take me away!" She screeched like a fan girl. I blushed.

"Wh-what do you think you're doing? G-get off!" I tried to push her away but she held on tighter.

"AWAY!"

"But-"

"AWAY!"

"The skateboard can't hold more than one!"

"IT'S A HOVERBOARD STOOPID! NOW AWAY!"

"NO!"

The girl let go of me and pushed me off the board. I fell down and propped myself up with my hands.

"Hey!"

The brown haired girl laughed and pointed to the sky, "ITS A HOVERBOARD!" she kicked her feet off the ground but as soon as she did she lost balance and fell down leaving the skateboard to crash into a wall.

I gasped and rushed to get my beloved skateboard. I saw at the dent that she caused and looked back angrily.

"LISTEN LADY-" I was cut off when I saw that she… had stripped bare.

"HOLY MOTHER!" I closed my eyes as tight as I could and she started laughing.

"Don't like what 'ya see champ? HAHA FREEEDOM!" she shouted and ran away scaring little boys and girls, making men nosebleed and ogle and making a certain green-haired girl screech and punch her in the gut, knocking the drunkard out.

This day just can't get any better.

* * *

**CHOCOLATEPANTS is being very random today. And that naked lady just popped out of nowhere, now, this green haired girl. Who could she be?**

**CHOCOLATEPANTS AWAAY!**


	4. Baboons

**SORRY FOR THE LONG UPDATE AND THE EXTREMELY SHORT CHAPTER!**

"Explain."

"Uh…"

"Why were you outside in the middle of your shift?"

"Err…"

"What were you doing anyway?"

"Umm…"

I tugged my kimono and bit my upper lip. _Geez… the boss can be so strict…_

"The-there was this o-order…" I started.

Darn. Why is talking to girls so hard? I see Kusanagi-san do it every day! It doesn't kill him…. So why?

I took a deep breath, "She-she wanted seaweed…"

The boss made a face, "Seaweed?" She asked, narrowing her eyes, "What for? Rice balls?"

"U-uh…" I bit my lip harder, the truth sounded too insane. But I can't lie! But if I tell the truth she won't believe me, but-

"Misaki…" She said, waving a hand in front of me, "Quit zoning out."

"Coffee…" I said softly.

"Hmm? What's wrong with coffee?"

_I am an idiot… I am an idiot…_

"The se-seaweed…" I said, looking straight into her eyes, "It was…. For coffee..."

_I am a maniac, idiot, gorilla, freak….crow…_

* * *

Well, to make a long story short.

I was fired.

I shall give my special thanks to the group of baboons. Especially to the one that ordered seaweed. And the one who's nickname literally meant monkey. And the one that gets all cranky when it comes to spelling errors.

Yes. I had presented my thanks to them… With the sacred Yata finger.

"Yata-saaaan!"

I looked pass my shoulder to see a fat chubby man running to me. I gave him an annoyed look, "What?" I said sharply.

The man seemed unfazed and kept running to me. A stupid grin on his face.

I was just about to ask him what was up when everything crashed upon me.

He must've seen me. Which means they must've seen me. Which means Misaki going through shame and embarrassment whenever he would step foot in the HOMRA bar.

Oh Misaki you fool.

"Yata-san! Hold up! I want to say something!"

Go, go skateboard goooooooo!

"Wait!" He shouted as he tugged my shirt. He spun me so that I was facing him. The man gave me a big giant idiotic grin and-

"ANNA-CHAN SAYS YOU LOOK HORRIBLE IN THAT _DRESS_!"

* * *

How was I going to pay for it now?

They say when you work hard you get something in return. I had worked in a cosplay café and made a fool out of myself and what do I get?

SMS's.

Very disturbing SMS's.

Period.

I heard knocks from my door but I didn't move from my bed. Even if I really wanted to go out and thank whoever it was with my sacred finger. I just lay there, waiting for the knocking to stop.

Unfortunately, it didn't.

"Argh!" I heaved myself up and made my way to the door, quickly opening it.

"Honey, I heard you needed money so-"

"MOTHER! I LOVE YOU!"

* * *

"Here." The little boy said, as he handed out an envelope, "Your part."

I grinned and took the money, "Thank you… Now, the pictures?"

The little boy sighed and handed out his phone.

Yes, there were pictures of the cosplay café's evil overlord in there.

"There. But I took another hundred yens away. That jerk was really mean…"

I nodded at the boy, "Doesn't matter. I just needed the pictures..." I said, smirking as I scanned the pictures.

"Now. To post them in the internet…"

* * *

**CHOCOLATEPANTS is doneeee! Thank you fellow reviewers and readers. I love you all!**

**CHOCOLATEPANTS AWAAAAAAY!**


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